I was aware of my parents’ many fine qualities from a very early age. Maybe all kids are—at least the lucky ones are. People generally are eager to portray themselves in the best possible light and I guess that pertains to the side of themselves that parents show to their kids. My parents were intelligent, accomplished, hard-working, loyal to a fault, fun, thoughtful, and loving. I never had a second when I doubted they loved me.
It wasn’t until much later that I began to become aware of their flaws. In my dad’s case it was until many, many years after his death at all too young an age.
Somewhat to my surprise I have learned that I inherited all of my parents’ worst qualities.
Life is stuggle to undo the damaging legacy left by our parents. Unfortunately, doing so completely will usually require more than a lifetime.
The only thing more distressing than the realization that you’ve inherited undesirable traits from your parents is seeing them passed on to your children.
Sometimes, though, when you have knowledge of your parent’s flaws, you try to self-correct with your own children. The self-correction can backfire, creating just another imperfection, except in the opposite direction of the one your parent had.