For the last few days I’ve been out in California attending the memorial service for my mother-in-law. Some of those in attendance I hadn’t seen in 30 years.
The occasion was one of mixed feelings. On the one hand we missed her but on the other she was 93 years old and has been suffering from dementia for a number of years. The woman we had known has not been really present for some time. As her son put it, she’s been released.
I don’t know how to adequately describe her to you. She had children who treasured her. Even during the many years in which she was in a skilled nursing facility she was visited on a daily or near-daily basis. She had a husband who was mad about her. They had eloped at 18 and were like newlyweds right until the time of his death twenty years ago.
She maintained an immaculate home while working outside the home.
She came from a family of craftsmen and was always working on something. To paraphrase my wife’s eulogy of her, she could see the potential in a piece of dirt or scrap of cloth or block of wood. Or in a person.
From each she would coax the best to create something beautiful. A beautiful garden. A dress. A carving. A better person.
She is missed.
. . . she’s been released.
That reminds me of one of my favorite gospel songs:
“When the shadows of this life have gone,
I’ll fly away;
Like a bird from these prison walls has flown,
I’ll fly away (I’ll fly away)”
I’m sorry to hear of you and your wife’s loss.
I wanted to use that in the service. I was overruled.
Thank you. Honestly, the loss was a decade ago.
Your post reminded me of a favorite uncle that died last year who was no longer himself. A couple of his grandchildren sang that song at the funeral service and it was quite beautiful.
Pass along my condolences to your wife.