I’m in a bit of a blue funk (U. S. meaning) today for many reasons on many fronts. More about that later.
I’m not a father and at this point of my life it’s pretty unlikely I’ll become one. My wife’s father died a generation ago. I considered him a friend but he wasn’t a father figure to me. My own father died two generations ago. One of my life’s great regrets is that my dad died just as I was beginning to cultivate a grown-up relationship with him. All I can say is that I think he was a great man and I miss him. My siblings barely remember him.
Happy Father’s Day to all who can actually celebrate it. If you don’t realize it, understand that you are already blessed.
My own father died in my early 20’s,, and I had accomplished very little, except for acquiring a BS in nursing and marrying a man my father approved – unlike some of my other boyfriends. Otherwise, I was a young adult with attitude and little life experience.
I wish he had seen more of how I turned out, and we had been able to share conversations rooted in my increasing maturity blended with an appreciation of my dad’s wisdom. However, I think of him often, recall all the advice I earlier had ignored, and am extra grateful for his presence in my life on the one day fathers are universally recognized and honored.
My father was born in miserable circumstances (West Virginia coal miner’s son, one of seven children surviving) and thanks to hard work, circumstances (WWII and the GI bill) and a little luck (meeting my mother) got out of Dodge and made something of himself. I was fortunate enough to not only know him as a grown man but to have worked with him practically up to the day he died, not quite thirteen years ago. He had his flaws, but in many ways he was an inspiration to me, and I was glad to have gotten to know him well as a person, not just as a force of nature.
My parents were both inspirations to me and, honestly, living up to the standards they set is difficult. My mom was the first person in her family to graduate from 8th grade. She went on to graduate from high school and college, eventually earning an advanced degree. My dad was born over a saloon in the toughest neighborhood of St. Louis. He remembered delivering lunches to the men who worked in the city morgue, his job from an early age. He was the second generation of his family to graduate from college and then law school with a JD. One of his uncles was a lawyer, too, had graduated from college and law school.