In what I take as a sure sign of increasing affluence in China, a new job category has emerged: mistress dispeller. At the New Yorker Jiayang Fan explains mistress dispellers:
Mistress dispellers use a variety of methods. Some Little Thirds can be paid off or discouraged by hearing unwelcome details of their lovers’ lives—debts, say, or responsibility for an elderly parent—or shamed with notes sent to friends and family. If the dispeller or the client is well connected, a Little Third may suddenly find that her job requires her to move to another city. A female dispeller sometimes seeks to become a confidante, in order to advise the targeted woman that the liaison will inevitably crumble. In certain cases, a male mistress dispeller may even seduce the woman. Like all the mistress dispellers I spoke to, Yu said that he never resorts to this tactic, but he acknowledged that there are those who do.
Mamas don’t let your babies grow up to be mistress dispellers!
Traditional Confucian China allowed men to take more than one wife, the maximum number of wives dictated by your wealth and rank. It also tolerated concubinage. There is a voluminous literature of the intrigues to which this system gave rise, something that should discourage fans of plural marriage here. Dynasty had nothing on some of these Chinese stories.
Here’s a quote from a trainer of mistress dispellers (yet another new job category):
“Marriage is like the process of learning to swim,†Ming said. “It doesn’t matter how big or fancy your pool is, just like it doesn’t always matter how good your husband is. If you don’t know how to swim, you will drown in any case, and someone else who knows how to swim will get to enjoy the pool.â€
People have been wondering what sorts of new jobs will be created as more jobs are automated. I’d like to see a robot take this job.
Wonder how Dolly Parton’s Jolene translates into Chinese.
Hell, everybody else has covered it.
I was a Little Third for seven years. An emotional relationship, not a financial one. Not proud of it, just part of my history. Chinese advice doesn’t sound much different from I would give.
The older man called his wife “his buddy.” He offered to marry me, and took an apartment across the hall from mine. It would have been the worst mistake of our lives for both of us.
He is now about 90 and his wife is two years older. They won.
Speaking of norms, look at Melania here.
She is slumping and it looks terrible on her. She is a Pilates devotee. Her shoulders are usually square and she has an erect posture. But she wears 4-5 inch heels. Can’t be as tall as her husband. She could cut the heel height down and look better at it.
Don’t think I’m ragging on her as a hater. According to Vanity Fair, the women in NY say she is in remarkable shape, better than most of them. She has a real chance here to become a woman of some consequence. Wherever it takes her.
Compare here.
She was a model. She married a rich guy. I suspect that she has little chance of being a woman of consequence either because she just doesn’t have what it takes, or Trump would never let himself be upstaged. He would shove her out of the way to make sure he dominates the pictures.
Steve
We’ll see. I’m enough of a feminist to wish her well. You know, Trump bragged about taking Carla Bruni away from Mick Jagger. She said at the time that he was insane.
My favorite First Lady picture is Laura Bush in a big blue dress.
I’m mad about that dress, and she wore it well. Have one in khaki like it (shorter), but with epaulettes. Time to give it away.